Been trying to decide what sort of verbal (written) diarrhea to subject the world to next, and thought maybe a sensible, seasonal topic would be good.
What am I thankful for? And not in any particular order....
Obviously, I’m thankful I have a job! It’s been an ugly time and so many people have lost their jobs, I have to be thankful I have mine, even if I often think it’s gong to be the death of me before retirement gets here. Working for judges isn’t always the easiest thing to do. There is a joke one of the supervisors told me my first day in the office, a guy goes to Heaven and meets St. Peter at the gate. St. Peter greets him and invites him in. The man says he would love to enter, but he cannot imagine spending eternity with lawyers, so he needs to know if there are lawyers in Heaven. St. Peter laughs and says, of course there are no attorneys! Never had any. So the man enters Heaven and one of the first people he sees is wearing a black robe and has a gavel. The man is very upset and goes to find St. Peter. He says, “St. Peter, you lied! Not only is there an attorney in Heaven, he’s a judge!” St. Peter chuckles and says “That’s not an attorney, that just God! He thinks he is a federal judge!” Yep, we all like it...
I’m thankful Pa appears to be in good health. As crazy as he makes me sometimes, I’m thankful I have this time to spend with him. (Also thankful I got to spend a couple of years with Mom here before she died.) Sometimes, he will tell me stories from back when he was working and usually they are hysterical. I wonder if Kenny and Calvin and Andy and Whitey and all of the rest have told as many stories about him? I wonder how they all didn't kill themselves...
I’m thankful for my dogs. Yes, they make me crazy, too, but they are also the epitome of unconditional, unlimited love. I have also met some wonderful people through the greyhounds. Strange, but wonderful!
I’m thankful for my friends:
Lil & John, I don’t know why, but whenever I have a melt down, they seem to be there to give me a hand. I've known Lil since grade school, so I guess she is one of my “oldest” friends! (Don’t you love that, Lil?)
Diane & Steve, also always there when I need a hand, or a shoulder to cry on! I don’t know what I would have done had you guys not been there to help with the house in Illinois. Diane is another one of those “old” school friends...
Torri & Judith, both “greyhound” friends, but sort of more like little sisters now. Wow, how many times have we cried on each other’s shoulders? Linda & Herb, also “greyhound” friends, but they sure came through when we were losing our minds!
Donna, my former neighbor and now Guardian Angel, what would I do without her? She is always there when shPOOPt happens!
Robin & Joe and their kids, Zakary, Kayley and Brennan. They are fairly recent “adoptions” to my family, I never had a little brother, so I adopted Joe and his family! They have really been there, too, when the shPOOPt hit the fan!
JoAnn, she sort of fits in the “friends” and “family” category. We have so much in common, and can sit and talk until the wee hours of the morning. If we can both stay awake! (Now, if we could only get Joey to get a computer!)
I’m thankful for the Internet! It has allowed me to reconnect with more old friends! DJ & Ann & Merridy, I really want to get together with you guys in 2010! Pam! It’s been a long time since high school, and boy, have we both changed?!
The Internet has allowed me to reconnect with family! Aunt Rosie & Millie & Tisha & Cheryl & Diane & Harry & Gerry & Jill & Beverly. We know how bad I am at letters, so it’s a good thing!
I’m thankful for the Internet introducing me to new friends:
Diego, we couldn’t be more different, yet there is a common bond. You know why I think we understand each other.
Tor & Jenn, you continue to amaze me. I’ve never had a lot of patience and forgiveness hasn’t always been my forte, either! You show loyalty I only wish I could emulate!
I’m even thankful for Carol & Phil & Kathy, my sister, brother-in law and niece. Mom always said Carol was thrilled to have a little sister. Some days I wonder if Carol would have been as “thrilled” had she known what she was getting into...
I’m thankful for re-discovering Music this year. You may not understand that, but music has always been something that touches me deeply, makes my life happier and more complete. I’m thankful for discovering Adam Lambert, Sam Sparro, Ferras, and Cassidy Haley this year.
I’m thankful to live in the United States. I’ve met people from many other countries through my job, and you don’t appreciate what you have until you hear what it’s like to live in some of those places. There is a reason people will chance death walking through deserts, hiding away on ships, jumping on moving trains, trying to make it on rafts.
I’m thankful for all of the members of the armed forces, past and current, active duty and reserve, who serve our country. Thanks to their families who have also sacrificed for all of us to have this great country in which we live. There is that saying, “Freedom Isn’t Free,” and you all know that better than anyone.
I’m thankful for all of our law enforcement community. I’ve known those crazy people who go undercover, who put themselves out there to bring in the “scary” people I only have to talk to with bars and bulletproof glass between us.
I’d like to be thankful for attorneys, but... I’m kidding! Their's is very difficult job, whether it’s from the prosecution side or the defense side. Our criminal justice system does not work without both.
And I’m thankful to be alive! Otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to subject you to these ramblings!
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Friday, November 6, 2009
The Tale of the Basement Dweller
When I moved to Colorado, I initially needed someone to help with the rent for a while. Met the person I “fondly” call the “Basement Dweller.” For simplicity’s sake, I’ll refer to him as BD. Now, there was an interesting person!
Lesson No. 1: Do not use a roommate finding service.
My first clue should have been that he described himself as “semi-retired” while in his early 40's. Second clue should have been the “extreme comb-over” that took about half a can of hair spray to keep in place. Third clue, well, when someone tells you they are creating a “light center” so aliens can find him... but I’m getting ahead of this story.
When BD came to meet me as a potential rent sharing person, I’m sure I did a double-take when he said he wasn’t working, but was living off a sizeable settlement he received from a former employer. He even produced a bank statement to prove he had the financial ability to pay rent for an extended period of time. Since there were no other potential roomies, I let him move into the basement bedroom of the house I was renting. My parents were not thrilled I had a man living in the basement. I think they worried about my “virtue.” After meeting him, they no longer had any of those concerns.
I soon learned the reason he decided to stop working and live on his savings was because he was educating himself in everything and anything “new age.” That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but when that is your sole occupation...
I eventually bought a house, and decided it would be financially to my advantage to let him move with me. OK, I thought I still needed the money. In retrospect, I don’t think I needed it all that bad.
Lesson No. 2: Beware of pyramids.
BD would spend time lying on the roof, contemplating the universe. He would go out in the back yard and hug the trees. Literally. The best one was when he built a pyramid out of pipe in the basement, drew a five pointed star inside it on the floor, and added crystals, rocks, candles, “stuff,” along with a cushion so he could meditate. In the pyramid. After he got it finished, he came upstairs into the living room, and started crawling across the floor, holding his hands about two inches off the floor. Of course, I had to ask what he was doing. (I’m sure you already know!) He was trying to see if he could feel the “energy” coming up through the floor from the top of the pyramid. Then he told me that he was building a “light center” in the basement (now, I have to think a basement would not be an ideal place for “light” anything.) Of course, I asked what might that mean. I learned he was trying to send a signal to the aliens. I was never sure if they were just coming to visit, or coming to take him away.
Then there was the day I came home from work and found he had shaved his head (which was a good thing since it was about 1/3 bald in the first place) and had face paint on. Can I say he scared the devil out of me? Yep, that’s putting it mildly.
I did like his cat. Was a very nice cat. Well, I liked him until he started, um, peepeeing on the carpet in the basement. I sort of lost my fondness for him then.
Lesson No. 3: Always have an exit strategy.
Exit for the renter, that is. After a while, I really didn’t want to deal with his eccentricities any more, but let’s be honest, he had no incentive to leave. So I gave him incentive. We had a guy helping at the greyhound adoption kennel who was truly a PITA. (If you don’t know what that means, I’ll explain it some day.) He needed a place to stay for a short time, I figured BD would not appreciate having to share the house with someone who was actually at the house during the day. I was right! Less than a week, and I found him packing up his stuff and moving on to who knows where. Not too long after that, roomie number 2 moved on. I finally had peace and quiet! I had my house to myself!
It was one of those experiences that you look back and laugh. You also think “whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” And finally, you think, “Ain’t never gonna do THAT again!”
The pyramid is long gone. The basement is now full of books and furniture. I haven’t gone out to hug the trees, I hope they can forgive me. I am a little concerned that the aliens will get a belated signal from the “light center” and stop by. I don’t know what I will tell them, he didn’t leave a forwarding address!
Lesson No. 1: Do not use a roommate finding service.
My first clue should have been that he described himself as “semi-retired” while in his early 40's. Second clue should have been the “extreme comb-over” that took about half a can of hair spray to keep in place. Third clue, well, when someone tells you they are creating a “light center” so aliens can find him... but I’m getting ahead of this story.
When BD came to meet me as a potential rent sharing person, I’m sure I did a double-take when he said he wasn’t working, but was living off a sizeable settlement he received from a former employer. He even produced a bank statement to prove he had the financial ability to pay rent for an extended period of time. Since there were no other potential roomies, I let him move into the basement bedroom of the house I was renting. My parents were not thrilled I had a man living in the basement. I think they worried about my “virtue.” After meeting him, they no longer had any of those concerns.
I soon learned the reason he decided to stop working and live on his savings was because he was educating himself in everything and anything “new age.” That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but when that is your sole occupation...
I eventually bought a house, and decided it would be financially to my advantage to let him move with me. OK, I thought I still needed the money. In retrospect, I don’t think I needed it all that bad.
Lesson No. 2: Beware of pyramids.
BD would spend time lying on the roof, contemplating the universe. He would go out in the back yard and hug the trees. Literally. The best one was when he built a pyramid out of pipe in the basement, drew a five pointed star inside it on the floor, and added crystals, rocks, candles, “stuff,” along with a cushion so he could meditate. In the pyramid. After he got it finished, he came upstairs into the living room, and started crawling across the floor, holding his hands about two inches off the floor. Of course, I had to ask what he was doing. (I’m sure you already know!) He was trying to see if he could feel the “energy” coming up through the floor from the top of the pyramid. Then he told me that he was building a “light center” in the basement (now, I have to think a basement would not be an ideal place for “light” anything.) Of course, I asked what might that mean. I learned he was trying to send a signal to the aliens. I was never sure if they were just coming to visit, or coming to take him away.
Then there was the day I came home from work and found he had shaved his head (which was a good thing since it was about 1/3 bald in the first place) and had face paint on. Can I say he scared the devil out of me? Yep, that’s putting it mildly.
I did like his cat. Was a very nice cat. Well, I liked him until he started, um, peepeeing on the carpet in the basement. I sort of lost my fondness for him then.
Lesson No. 3: Always have an exit strategy.
Exit for the renter, that is. After a while, I really didn’t want to deal with his eccentricities any more, but let’s be honest, he had no incentive to leave. So I gave him incentive. We had a guy helping at the greyhound adoption kennel who was truly a PITA. (If you don’t know what that means, I’ll explain it some day.) He needed a place to stay for a short time, I figured BD would not appreciate having to share the house with someone who was actually at the house during the day. I was right! Less than a week, and I found him packing up his stuff and moving on to who knows where. Not too long after that, roomie number 2 moved on. I finally had peace and quiet! I had my house to myself!
It was one of those experiences that you look back and laugh. You also think “whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” And finally, you think, “Ain’t never gonna do THAT again!”
The pyramid is long gone. The basement is now full of books and furniture. I haven’t gone out to hug the trees, I hope they can forgive me. I am a little concerned that the aliens will get a belated signal from the “light center” and stop by. I don’t know what I will tell them, he didn’t leave a forwarding address!
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